We waited at the bottom of the escalator, and then I saw him. He was holding a gift bag in one hand. He came up and gave me an extremely awkward hug. (He was only two months post-mission--I decided to give him a break about this.) He handed me the gift bag and a really nice card, and I opened the bag to find this guy:
I slept with that bear every single night from then on until the day we got married.
When we got into the car, he pulled out a CD he had burned and put it in. It had really great songs on it! Including the song that we decided was about us--forgive me for being cheese-tastic with this one--"I knew I loved you before I met you"--Savage Garden. The three of us had a good time talking and laughing together in the car.
I dropped Linzi off at her house, and BK and I proceeded to drive out to where the girls from the ward were currently having girls' camp. It was their special program on the last night, where parents and everyone were invited. My mom would be singing at it, so I thought it would be cool to take BK, and also so I could show him off to everyone.
The next morning BK had decided that we needed to get up at 5 in the morning to watch the US play in the World Cup. I decided it would be cool to try to impress him with my cooking skills, so I woke up before him to make him breakfast. Unfortunately, I had somehow forgotten how exactly to make pancakes--so after two failed batches, I finally remembered. I brought him breakfast in bed, and we proceeded to watch the game.
That day was the only day I wasn't able to get off work, so BK stayed at home with my family and Linzi came over, and they all played Scrabble. When I got home from work, we headed out to the McKinley's. Brother McKinley was majorly into fireworks, and at the seminary auction that year, he had donated a fireworks show with a BBQ at their house. Due to my insane scripture chasing skills, I had more seminary bucks then the rest of the other kids combined (except for David G. probably)--so needless to say, I definitely won that sucker and set it up for when BK came. Brother McKinley's daughter Melissa was the other girl in the note BK had left, and so she would be there, too, and it turned out to be a really fun evening. BK mentioned later that the whole time he was trying to think of a smooth way to kiss me during the fireworks, but he couldn't, so he didn't try. Lame.
Anyway.
The next day we went to visit some friends of mine and went out to dinner with Linzi. I dropped Linzi off and decided that I would make things extremely easy for BK. On our way home, I stopped in the parking lot of the playground next to my house. I put in the CD with our song on it, rolled down the windows, and proceeded to order BK out of the car to dance with me. And he finally kissed me. And "wow" is all I have to say about that.
Anyway.
The next day we hung out at my house. I had told BK we needed to watch "Pearl Harbor" because Dec. 7th is his birthday, and so it seemed fitting. Somehow we ended up kissing during the entire battle scene (aka one third of the movie). When my mom got home from the grocery store or wherever she was, she asked BK what he thought about the movie. He said he liked it. She said, "Yeah, I thought the battle scene was pretty spectacular." And BK looked at me, smiled, and said, "Yeah, the special effects were amazing..." (Sorry, Mom. I apologize for making out with my boyfriend while you were gone. But just so you know, it was Megan's fault. You left us home with her, and she was back in her room the whole time playing barbies or whatever it is that she spent her childhood doing.)
Then came the horrid day where I had to take him back to the airport. We wouldn't see each other for another two months. When we got to the airport, I pushed eject on the CD played to give him his CD back, and he told me to keep it, and handed me a card in which he explained why all of the songs reminded him of me, etc. I went and sat with him in the airport until he would have to go through security. When that time came, he asked my permission to kiss me (which I thought was sweet) and then he started crying. (Which, let me pause the story for a moment--I can count on one hand the times I have seen BK cry, even after 6 years of marriage--so looking back, this was extremely weird for him.) I asked him why he was crying, and he said, "Because this whole week has just been perfect, and I've just had the best time with you, and I'm worried that for whatever reason it will never be this perfect again. I just want this to work out for forever--and what if it doesnt? What if you move up to Utah in August and decide to date other people instead?"
I assured him I probably wouldn't. I watched him go through the security checkpoint until I couldn't see him anymore. I cried the whole way home, I missed him already. But at the same time I was so happy because we had been right--we were perfect for each other.
And thus began more emails and more phonecalls.
My 18th birthday came finally, and from BK I received: a dozen roses, a sweet card, a phonecall, AND he had recruited his sister Misty's help with the last gift. He warned me that I was not to open the last gift in front of my dad because it wasn't what I thought it was--which instantly told me it was from Victoria's Secret.
I made sure to open it in front of my dad--who of course, flipped out about it. But inside the box was an entire gift set--hand lotion, body spray, body cream, shower gel, and bath bubbles--and the fragrance? Why, passionate kisses, of course! My father definitely rolled his eyes at this.
Things just kept progressing really well. But for whatever reason, the whole marriage thing was just terrifying for me to even talk to him about. And he was getting frustrated about it. One night the conversation went as follows:
BK: Amy, have you prayed about it?
Amy: No.
BK: Why not?
Amy: Because I don't want to know.
BK: ?
Amy: I'm just not ready to know the answer to that question. I just don't understand how this is all supposed to work out, and as long as I still don't "know" then I don't have to worry about it.
This conversation started happening quite frequently, and it got to the point where I just knew I needed to pray about it if I wanted things to keep going the way they were going.
On July 31, 2002, I wrote:
"Yesterday was an awesome day. BK called and woke me up and told me about an experience he had on Sunday when he felt that it was right to marry me. So last night, I went to the park and talked to Heavenly Father about it. It is the right answer. I know that. I love him so much and spending forever with him seems like the best thing that could possibly ever happen to me. He makes me so very happy, and I can't wait to see him in 16 days. I'm not quite sure when things will happen, but we'll figure that out when I get there. I'm so excited about life! This time it's right!! It really is right!! Aah! I'm going to get married! To BK! Elder P. for heaven's sake is going to be my eternal companion someday. Could my life be any crazier?"
After telling BK about my experience, he wrote me a letter:
"...When I was scared of the whole marriage issue before I just couldn't imagine living with one person for the rest of my life. But then I thought about being with you all the time and having you right by my side and I knew that nothing more could make me happier. I thought about waking up next to you and I realized that marriage wouldn't be such a bad thing. With the wrong person it can be a bad thing, but with the right person it is simply wonderful. And in saying wonderful I don't mean that there will never be problems because I know that we will have plenty of those. But the problems and trials really don't scare me. I do not have fear of the future like I used to. That fear has been placed by faith and confidence."
A plane ticket to Utah was purchased for my move, and the countdown began again.
