Mud.

Today we drove to the bank to deposit some checks, and since the boys weren't going to be getting out, I didn't have them grab shoes before we left.

But on the way home, we stopped by to see Melanie, Roman, and Carmella and ended up going to the park with them.  Melanie let me borrow a couple of pairs of shoes for the boys, and then we were off.

The weather was nice.  Melanie and I had plenty to chat about, as usual.  The boys were playing somewhat nicely.  Then Landon and Roman ran off to go play in the grass in front of the Parks and Rec building by the park.  Melanie and I continued to chat, and then we noticed the boys were standing in the field looking rather guilty.

We walked over to investigate, and found them stuck ankle-deep in the middle of a huge pit of mud.  Melanie and I stood there, shocked by the mess and trying to think of what our next move would be.  Spencer of course stood by the mudpit, also threatening to go in.  A nice older hispanic lady walked out of the building and told us we should get our camera and take a picture because they "looked SO CUTE" stuck in the mudpit.  Then a younger guy with workboots on came out, and offered to unstick our children.  In that process both boys fell over, further coating themselves with mud.  Part of me wanted to laugh, part of me wanted to cry.  It would've been completely comical had it been someone's kids and someone else's mess for sure.  

The man finished unsticking our children, and I hauled both of mine into the building's just-cleaned bathroom.  I instructed Landon to sit in the sink and wash himself off, while I used the other sink to try to salvage the shoes Landon had borrowed, while Spencer ran around probably touching every toliet in the bathroom.  

Several office ladies walked in, and instead of rolling their eyes at the mess, smiled and told me how cute my boys are.  They laughed and told me again how cute the boys looked all guilty and stuck in the mudpit.  I laughed nervously, and continued scrubbing and shoes and the bathroom counter and my boys.  Eventually all items were clean enough for the car, and we walked to it.

I was mad at Landon--for making such a mess--mostly because I knew that even though I had tried to clean up that bathroom, they were probably going to have to mop it again.  But in my heart I knew I shouldn't raise my voice about it.  The mud will clean off, Amy.  It's not permanent.  

I calmly told Landon in the car ride home that playing in the mud at the park was not his greatest idea.  I told him about getting mud all over Rome's shoes.  I told him about the poor guy who had to wade out in the mud to get them.  I told him about the poor cleaning person who would have to go in and redo that entire bathroom she just cleaned.  I told him about how we had to leave the park because of that, and that next time there was mud, he should stay out of it.  He seemed to understand, and I was left wondering, Do I punish him for this?  Have I even ever talked to him about mud?  I can't remember?

But in my heart, I felt Just let it be, Amy.  He understands. 

But really??  How do I know he understands?? Isn't this my job?? To teach him to stay out of mud??  Shouldn't I make him feel sorry about it?

We came home, and Landon stripped off his filthy clothes.  I made them lunch, and as I set down his plate of food, he said, "Hey Mom.  I'm really sorry about getting in the mud."

And I said, "It's okay.  It'll wash off.  But let's not play in mud from now on, okay?"

"Okay, Mom.  I won't."

I know without a doubt this won't be the last time my child gets stuck, ankle-deep in mud.  But I'm also grateful to know that he is starting to internalize the things I say.  He obviously thought about the things I said, and, on his own, decided he needed to apologize.  This means more to me than any apology I've ever forced out of him.

There are certain things I feel that Landon needs to comply and give me a forced apology, of course--because he is three and is still learning.  But I was grateful for this experience because mud really isn't that big of a deal, and it let him have an opportunity to do a real apology, and for me to realize he can do it.

It's nice when you have days when they "get" it, ya know?? :)

the lucky leaf

This is where my boys and I have been for the past week.

 See?  Here we are:

My lovely friend Melanie invited us to come out to her parents' beach house, and since I was dealing with post-Christmas-ineedavacation-ness, I pretty much hopped in my car and started driving.

Some of the miraculous events that occured on our trip to Topsail Island are listed below:

• Landon kept a dry pull-up for a total of 39 HOURS ROUNDTRIP in the car.  I wouldn't have even cared if he hadn't, but that's seriously impressive.
• Somehow Landon didn't die of dehydration since apparently he wasn't drinking enough to wet his pants in the car...?
• Anyway
• My kids were AWESOME on the trip to and from the beachhouse.  Seriously, I could NOT believe how GOOD they were.  I would do it again in a heartbeat, and it's the day after.  Who SAYS that the day after a roadtrip??  ME.  Because apparently my kids rock at roadtrips.  That's how we roll.
• Last night they slept in the car for the last SIX HOURS of the trip.
• Any crying ceased after about 5 minutes.
• We didn't run out of fruit snacks until almost the end of the trip.
• The coyote-deer-whateveritwas that tried to kill me on the last 45 minutes of the trip did not succeed.  
• I drove the speed limit last night all the way from Meridian, MS to Waco, TX.  And even below the speed limit.  (see above about the coyote-deer)
• It turns out 5-hour-energy drinks really DO work.
• The beach was, of course, magical.
• Landon: "Heavenly Father made us beaches, huh, mom."
• DOLPHINS.
• Melanie and I did NOT get hypothermia from going boogie-boarding in the waves.
• Because apparently wetsuits really DO work.
• My children shared a room even during naptime on the trip, and weren't acting like sleep-deprived maniacs MOST of the time!
• We ate AMAZING food.
• More specifically: nutella cheeseball, blooming onion bread, homemade pizza rolls, awesome birthday cake, and corndogs.
• Soooo many parks to play at.
• And maybe once the sleep-deprivation-dizziness wears off, I'll remember even MORE!!

Stay tuned!!

Can you tell my camera is out of batteries... AGAIN?

Sorry, another boring post without any pictures.  But I really do have pictures to share... Landon's half-birthday, home-improvement projects... I'll get to it, don't worry!

So far, December is proving to be the best month ever.  Here's why.

1. I already got my Christmas shopping done... way more than my naughty children probably deserve, but it will make my year to see their faces light up with joy.  We only buy them gifts on their birthday or Christmas (or when they're potty-training) and so I don't feel too bad about the haul they're about to get.  Oh well.

2. Last night we had several families over for a Dessert Night at our house.  I really didn't think many people would come... since it seems like December is always a busy month for everyone, but so many people came! I felt so blessed that we have been able to meet so many nice people in the short 7 months we've lived here so far. I was worried about having enough room to fit them all, but I think everyone had a great time, and there were SO MANY yummy treats to try!!  Which brings me to my 3rd point...

3. We'll be eating yummy treats and leftovers for WEEKS!

4. We have some good friends coming to visit in a few weeks!  We haven't hung out with them in a year and a half or so, and I'm so excited to have them come! I love having company!!  Especially during the holidays!!  Speaking of...

5. My sister Megan is coming to town soon.  And on Christmas we will get to talk to my missionary-sister, Sara.  Hooray.

Anyway, so far December is looking like an amazing month! Happy Holidays to you and yours!

A morning run.

This morning I actually woke up early and went on a run before BK went to work.  It was nice, and it gave me time to think.

And so I wanted to write down some of the things I was pondering about.

Ever since we moved to our new house, BK has been getting up with the children.  He doesn't have work until 9am, and I've just felt so exhausted lately, and so he gets up with them and feeds them breakfast while I enjoy a few quiet extra moments to myself in bed.  It's been a really nice arrangement actually.  For me, anyway.  But lately, I've been feeling a little more well-rested, and while he hasn't mentioned it, I know that BK really wanted to go to the gym in the mornings.  So I had been thinking about this situation--and then a few days later, my lovely friend Melanie (who also had the same husband-getting-up-with-the-kids situation) told me that she had decided to get up with her kids so that Dean could start going to the gym.  It sort of confirmed to me that what I had been thinking was what I needed to do, too.  So I told BK last night that we could work something out so that he could go to the gym in the morning.  This situation caused me to (again) be grateful for two things:

1) I'm married to a man who is helpful.  He likes spending time with our boys and wants to make my life easier.  While he's grateful of course to go to the gym instead of watching the children, I'm glad to be in a situation where I can choose to do nice things for him, not be forced or guilted into it.  I have felt so tired from having a baby (over a year ago, I know) and then BK crazy clinical schedule right afterward--but I'm glad that he's given me some time to get some extra sleep so I could get back on my feet.

and

2)  I'm so grateful for good friends.  I have been blessed to meet many great and personally inspirational people already since moving here, and it has been a huge blessing to me.  I'm grateful for friends that I can have uplifting conversations with--conversations that ultimately inspire me to be a better person--not just "griping" conversations.  I'm grateful for friends that have reached out to me already, knowing of my struggles and heartaches.  It has eased my burdens, and once again, let me know that my Father in Heaven is mindful of me and wants me to be happy.

I also pondered about Baby #3.  I have no idea when he/SHE(??) will make his/HER appearance into our family, and while I hope it is sooner rather than later, I'm not as stressed about it as I thought I would be.  Sure, I've been frustrated and anxious about it, but on my run this morning, I just felt peace about it.

I'm grateful for past months (years) of dealing with this lack of control I have over my body in this area.  Because I can tell I'm growing.  The past few months I have been feeling strongly that there is another child waiting to join our family.  In half-awake moments early in the morning, when (somehow) both of my children have weaseled their ways into our beds, I find myself asking myself, "Where's the other one?"  And then I wake up fully, feeling confused as to why I would feel that way.  I remember feeling very similar a few months before we got pregnant with Spencer, and I was worried that it would never happen because of our struggles getting Landon to finally make an appearance in our family.  But lo and behold, the Lord had a plan, and magically, Spencer appeared out of nowhere.  I'm grateful for that experience because it helped me to recognize that feeling this time around.  While I don't have all of the answers (and while it may need more medical intervention than last time.... who knows.), I'm not worried about it.  I know that when we are doing all that we can, that the Lord can bless us with His plan in our lives.  In His timing.  I've already seen it happen twice, I know it will happen again.  And I don't need to spend the time in between my timing and His being worried and sad.  I just need to be hopeful.  And patient.  The Lord has ALWAYS kept His promises to me about the timing of children.  I wish that I wouldn't have wasted so much time doubting that in years past.

When we first wanted to start a family, I felt very strongly that I should graduate college first.  But I ignored that and spent the next 3 years being a complete basketcase about it.  And of course, a couple of weeks after I received my diploma, I also was blessed with a positive pregnancy test.  (The story was, of course, a bit more complicated than that, but the point remains.)

I also came home and listened to a conference talk (after I locked my children outside in the backyard) and I got an answer which inspired an attitude adjustment in another area of my life.
I just love days where I feel inspired. :)

Dining Room Redo--part 1

Sometimes I surprise myself at how much I can get done in a day with two kids.

Today included a trip to Lowe's and painting galore.

Here is what our dining room looked like before we moved in.

My parents were generous enough to gift us their dining room furniture purchased in 1996.

I love this furniture because it reminds me of growing up.  And whatdyaknow even my missionary husband ate a dinner or two at this very table on his mission.

But it was still a little out-dated.  And luckily my mother isn't too nostalgic and encouraged me to refinish it.

And so that's what I did.  

Oh, and BK and I also painted the walls tonight.

The hutch cabinets aren't quite done yet.
There's some finish on the table that's still drying--hence the white streaks.)

Aaaaand.... I still have 5 chairs to paint. (Painting party, anyone???)

But this gives you an idea.

I love it.

Now to find some curtains, a rug, and some decor!

Miscellaneous

1. I've been pondering lately about hope.  All of the sudden it dawned on me that the reason we should have hope in any situation isn't because is will change the outcome--but because it will improve our quality of life in the present.  Duh, right?  I'm not quite sure why this just dawned on me all of the sudden--it's not like there's anything I'm hopeless about right now, but I'll just tuck away that little nugget for when I need it next.

2.  I'm sort of done feeling guilty for "slacking" in some areas of my life.  This just dawned on me last night.  We've sort of had a rough past couple of weeks, with reasons including, but not limited to: Spencer cutting four teeth, Landon pushing every single button I have, BK having some busy work days because co-workers were out of town, me not feeling 100% since my children have been waking up several times a night each night for the past two weeks and then deciding to wake up for the day at 5:45am, Spencer throwing up, Landon having a cough--I could go on, but I'll stop.  I've been a little flaky in some other areas of life, and I was sort of beating myself up about it, and then I said to myself  "Amy, knock it off.  Your family is your very first priority, and that's where your focus needs to be right now."  Again, DUH, right?  Most of the time our life is pretty chill, and I have plenty of time to get plenty of other things done, but the past two weeks have just been survival mode for us, and that's okay.  It would be different if I was sitting around doing nothing all day, but I don't.  It has literally taken every ounce of energy and patience to deal with my children this past couple of weeks, and that's exactly where it should be spent.

3. In related news, my children actually slept in this morning, and so things are looking up for us.  Hooray for this.

4.  Recently BK and I have set up a little babysitting exchange with our friends Melanie and Dean.  Mel and I take turns each weekend babysitting each other's children.  But we go out after the kids are in bed, so it's a win-win situation.  One couple gets to go out, and the other wife gets to have a completely quiet evening at the other person's house, and the other husband gets to sit at home playing videogames until she returns.  Like I said, WIN-WIN, right??

5. I'm not quite sure why no one has told me how hilarious Parks and Recreation is, but I've discovered it lately and have been watching episodes here and there, and even though my abs still hurt from the church volleyball tournament, I've been laughing outloud uncontrollably.  Ron is my favorite.

6. I think that is all the miscellaneous information I have to share at this time.  Tonight we're having Melanie and Dean over for trick-or-treating and goodie-baking, so pictures will follow soon, I'm certain.  Happy Halloween, everyone!

Dearest Spencer Neal,

A few days ago we celebrated your half-birthday.  Upon both your and your brother's births, I asked your great-grandfather to pick a bundt cake recipe in your honor.  Yours is a yummy pound cake, and since it was your half-birthday, I made it for you.

You seemed pleased with the arrangement.

Your brother was not having his best day.

But you didn't care.

Your father pretended to be grumpy, too.  But he really wasn't.

Oh, good.  Your happy brother finally joined the family again.

In our family we allow members who are above the age of 18 months to participate in family prayer and scripture study.  Here's what you did during your first scripture study:

Yyyyeah.  So we have some work to do.

But anyway, I'm glad you're in our family.  You're turning into such a little man instead of a baby lately.  Your little (big) personality shines through more and more each day.  You're quite a spunky, spirited little thing.  So yes, you fit in quite perfectly with the rest of us.  

You took your first nursery-day a lot better than other members of our family have. *cough, cough, landon, cough, cough*  And while you still cried a little, I think you're going to adjust just fine.  Which is such a huge blessing for us, so thanks for that.  

You have brought so much joy to our lives.  Watching you and Landon interact as brothers has been one of  the highlights of my life so far.  You make Landon laugh more and harder than anyone else can.  And you can't even talk yet.  Ohhhhh, boy.  What are we in for?

You and your brother still share a room, and I hope you always will.  Even though we have bedrooms to spare, I want your friendship to grow.  Every night when we put you guys to bed, you lay in there and "talk" to each other.  Sometimes Landon sings you songs.  Mostly you just bounce around your crib pretending to bonk your head because it makes Landon laugh. And I am left mopping up my heart-puddle on the floor.  I know you won't always get along so well, but I just love it when you do.  Awwww,  BROTHERS!

You look just like your dad, and I like that about you.  

You only liked me for the first 13 months of your life.  And on Mother's day this past year, you decided you only liked your father.  And I was fine with that.  But lately I've been wishing you liked me a little bit more.  And wouldn't ya know, magically when you turned 18 months, you've turned into my little cuddlebug again!  Yayyyyy!

Thank you for being you.  I love you with all my heart, and I can't wait to see what the next 6 months brings us!

Love,

Mama